Saturday, May 24, 2008

The Perfect Sock Pattern?

I don't know how many different sock patterns I have tried over the last few months. I'd start them and then I'd have to frog (rip, rip) them because there were too many mistakes. I was having a hard time focusing on the yarn overs and SSKs and K2TOGs especially at my knit nights.

Back in February, shortly after my ex left, I posted about a simple pattern to knit because I needed something that didn't require concentration because besides not being able to eat or sleep and crying/sobbing all the time, my concentration sucked.

Emiko, Raven, and Suna all suggested socks with an easy pattern like Stockinette or ribbing.

I went for the ribbing and I thought I would try knitting 2 at the same time on 2 circulars (mistake). That didn't work out for me. I felt like I was going to poke an eye out with the circular I wasn't knitting with. So then I tried knitting 2 at the same time on 2 circulars (another mistake). My circular was a little too small for that but adequate. However, I kept getting ladders on the inside and losing stitches.

It was mindless knitting grant you, but I was so mindless and unable to concentrate and I'm sure crying out of grief sometimes, that there were a TON of mistakes. A TON of mistakes. But I kept knitting thinking that somehow I could live with the holes and the ladders and twisted stitches.

And then I realized that like the relationship that had just ended that I just had to give up on them no matter how much I hoped they would work out. So I frogged them despite the fact that I really loved the yarn, really loved it. It was just the right colors, ocean blues, and it was Blue Moon Fiber Arts Socks That Rock so they felt great despite looking crappy.

And then I cast on for another pair of socks. But somehow I still haven't been able to knit a decent pair. I'd start a pattern and it just wouldn't go right. They would either be too big or too small or the stitch pattern hard to memorize and I couldn't seem to get gauge no matter how many needle sizes I went down.

It has been very frustrating. But then I thought I found THE pattern, Tidal Wave Socks. Here was a pattern that had a pretty easy stitch pattern to follow and when I knitted it I was able to knit it even at knit nights.

But then last week at my Thursday night Stitch n' Bitch, Beorn asked me if I was working on sweater sleeves. Now Beorn is pretty new to knitting so I figured he hadn't seen too many socks being knit. And yes they were huge but I tried them on and they were kinda loose, but I could live with it right? I just didn't want to start over again.

But then this week at my other knitting group in Renton, I mentioned that Boren had said that my socks looked like sweater sleeves, and everyone agreed! Lauren suggested that I make them knee highs so that I could decrease down to the right size. I like this idea except for the fact I really don't like knee highs and I don't think I have enough yarn to knit socks that long.

I wasn't about to give up on the socks though. And I kept knitting. It is the process right?!? Well, last night I pulled them out to work on and I realized that I hadn't used a smaller knitting needle after the ribbing on the second sock. So it was even bigger then the first one.

Time to admit to myself that it wasn't working out. And so I frogged them. (Ialuixh you should be proud of me!)

Now it is on to another pair of socks. This time it is the Los Manos Locos socks (appropriate huh?!?) that are a knit stitch version of the famous Monkey socks by Cookie A. I cast on a few less stitches because my gauge is 7.5 stitches instead of 9 stitches per inch. But I know how to be flexible, gotta be in this life right?

So my socks kinda represent the grief process I've been going through the last few months. Betrayal/Disbelief/Shock (my socks are okay, how could anything be wrong with them? isn't this like the 100th time I've tried to get them right?), Anger (how can you call my socks sweater sleeves? Can't you tell they are socks!), and Acceptance (okay, these socks really suck and it is time to rip them out no matter how much I want them to work out).

Knitting and life, gotta love it! Neither are perfect (at least mine aren't) but that's okay.


Deborah said...

I am glad you are working thru your grief. It is difficult but necessary as I'm sure you know. I am not working through a break-up or divorce and I can not get the hang of knitting socks. The best I did was when I knitted the ankle portion on inside out. I cast, get a few rows in and have to frog. I have not tried four needles, I can barely deal with the dpns. I give it up for awhile and then try it again. One of these days, I will get it too! Wishing you well.

Suna said...

The important thing is that you keep going. Every sock you frog taught you something. Like for me, every job that goes away is a learning experience (grr). I am proud of you for your perseverance in all aspects of your life.

emicat said...

I admire your tenacity in both how you've handled your break up and not giving up on the knitting that has given you grief! I'd have thrown the needles in a fit of rage, but you've been very zenlike and trudging through like the strong woman you are.

I think this pair of socks will be one of your faves just because you and the yarn have gone through so much together - just think of how good it will feel when it all comes together and you get to wear the end result :)